I’m sure you woke up this morning and thought to yourself, “How would the Seinfeld gang have coped with the largest act of terrorism on American soil, September 11?” No? You didn’t? Well comedian Billy Domineau recently woke up one day thinking exactly that and decided, you know what, I’m just going to write the script. So he did.
Hi. I wrote a 9/11 episode of Seinfeld. I’d love for you to read and enjoy and hate me for it. https://t.co/Jq8JhFRxCv
— Billy Domineau (@BillyDomineau) August 2, 2016
Domineau, a current freelance contributor to SNL’s Weekend Update and former contributor to the Onion News Network, posted the full 44 page spec script to his Twitter on August 2nd. The episode is simply titled, “The Twin Towers”.
Here is the episode’s cold open. It sets the dark, but completely Seinfeldian tone early, and never loses sight of it.
To any skeptics who feel the concept may be purely shock-valuey, it only takes a few pages for jaws to drop from Domineau’s skillful writing and total grasp of Seinfeld’s characters, story arc, and stage-direction gags.
He honors every character in the show with a fittingly morally reprehensible story arc. George pretends to be a hero who saved survivors from the attacks.
Kramer tries to get reimbursed for a box cutter that the plane’s hijacker borrowed from him.
Jerry shows his germophobic side when confronted with a dust-covered New York.
And Elaine tries to break things off with a survivor who is always makes annoying sound effects when he talks.
Larry David would be proud. You can read the script in it’s entirety here.